intro contemplations
yo,
The pain, that can't be tamed. Waves of rain saved up in the tank I made.
I got an A, i'm on top of grades, but my moms a maid, and my songs so long and my songs the same.
To the bong i'm slaved. Is it wrong? Hit the gong, I'm chained, God, I'm sorry I'm not a saint.
They say its so blonde what I got to say, while I rot away - while I rock the gate.
Rock up to school I was shoppin, shock I'm late. Can't reach the top, teacher got my locked in reigns.
Put my feet in my socks, while I trip and trot today, hip hops insane, got me feeling lost in gangs.
I stop to play, preacher made me gospel pray. I cropped the cross, but i can't to crop the shame. I lost the loss, but i can'ttop the gains.
The cost of shame... while I cross main road tossin mates cock blockin my way home, with a rusty blade onto choppin again, lone. This its not what i want on my resume, stop watch watchin like i'm on a race... go!
My daddy told me "sorry bobby I can't be saved so, put me in a box bobby I can't be brave bro". With dollars going thru me I forgot to save low bank account not enough to pay for the grave. Cremation was the way float away in the waves bro. Hhis dust through my fingers man I wished that this aint so. His love feeling lingers, departs through my fingers, my heart feels him singing through the stars and my veins yo.
my eyes tired
full up defeat
my mind fried
i start to weep
another night passes and this tiger cries to sleep
try to lie to myself as i fly the sheep
1 million still counting but i can't go deep
stuck up on a mountain but my laughters weak
a billion tear fountain noah's ark would sink
hope departs no more art so my heart concrete
peakin out in my brain but my brain can't think
like drained i'm a strain underneath i leak
see i'm trained to be straight got no right to free
dom dumped in a classroom mate i tried to flee
them now the school masters comin
barely passing c's
the alarm bell ringin now it hard for me
to be myself
at war with a score
so I ask for peace
pass the peace pipe fill it with the grass i need
glass half empty fill it with some love for b
see i lost not a peice but a half of me
comin last got no laughs on a raft at sea
oh shark comon pass your sharp teeth i'm meat
wishing I could go back
like rewind the clock
go untwine the bad
undefine the box
but i gotta not
think about the past i lost
remind myself like a hobby what i got alot
the present is my weapon
my head sees the lessons
gone all the signs i blocked
while the past is so deadened
lookin up to the heavens
forget my legs feel like lead
while i start to rock
not in the red with aggression
or in my head with depression
gone my obsession with pretendin
i've descended and ascended
shedding feathers while i'm standin on the edge
can you hear me?
nod
yo,
i'll tell ya what i know what i don't
as i tie the rope tight around my throat
while i write light i'm hoping that i choke
say good night i don't know if i'll cope
while i fight i'm sliding down this slope